Dear diary, I feel exasperated. Everything is just not good. Idk why I'm still into him even though there's no romance, nothing at all. Why? Why am I still holding on to hope? What am I holding on to exactly? Sweet memories of the past? We are nothing now. Nothing. I don't dare to be near to him. And he doesn't come near me too. All the closeness, the intimacy, are gone. I don't know who he is anymore. Why am I still holding on? Why am I not letting go when there's nothing left of us? I feel like he's a stranger just across the table n across the street. No longer someone dear to me whom I hold close to anymore. It seems like the guy I once knew and experienced so much with is all a dream. We're gradually losing everything that held us close, and he isn't doing anything. Im not too but that's cos I'm scared. N I'm tired of all these. So effing tired. Caught in between the black and white area. And he probably doesn't give a shit anymore. Perhaps we're just passer bys in each other's lives afterall.